Not Because I Know How to Yodel
by Nefertiri's Handmaiden
Summary: Perry White didn't become the Editor in Chief of the Daily Planet because he knows how to yodel. A blantant wink at 'Lois and Clark.' Part 6 up and COMPLETE... for real this time!
1. Part I: Superman's Boss

It's Not Because I Know How to Yodel

Nefertiri's Handmaiden

Disclaimer: I don't own Superman I, II, III, IV, or Superman Returns. I don't own the comics. I don't own the characters. I don't own the TV shows. I don't own anything… can we get on with it now?

Author's Note: Perry White isn't the Editor of the Daily Planet because he knows how to yodel. (A blatant wink at _Lois and Clark_.)

Also, I don't have a beta, so forgive any misspellings. I can't catch them all. If anyone would like to beta for me, let me know in a review and I'll contact you. Thanks and enjoy!

* * *

My name is Perry White. You probably know me as the Editor in Chief of the Daily Planet: the greatest newspaper on the planet. I've been doing this job longer than I care to think about it: and I've been pounding the pavement chasing stories for even longer. But I'm damn good at it. If there is a story somewhere, I can find it.

And I'm sitting on the biggest story in the history of my career. The biggest story in the history of the Daily Planet. One I made a vow to myself that I would never write.

I'm Superman's boss.

I can hear you laughing now, but I'm serious. Superman works for me. Not when he's in the suit: I don't decide who lives and who dies and which natural disasters are averted and which ones rage. I don't control the news. But I do control who writes it.

And the truth is that Superman is a damn good reporter.

Because most of the time, Superman is Clark Kent.

That's right. The surprised gasping is much appreciated.

You'd never guess it to look at foolish, bumbling, goofy, accident-prone Kent that he's such a good reporter. Second only to Lois Lane. And third only to myself. Well, perhaps fourth after Cronkite. And you'd certainly never guess that he's really Superman: consistently ranked by People Magazine as one of the top two most beautiful people (sometimes that crazy Bat-person from Gotham makes the number one spot and once, for some reason which neither I nor anyone else understood, the Martian Manhunter got it), the uncontested Hero of Metropolis, and quite arguably the most powerful being on the planet.

But by Jove, he is.

I didn't realize it at first. He did do a good job of hiding it. But eventually, an old news hound like me had to catch the scent.

The first thing I noticed was all the unexplained disappearances. Where the hell was he going? But I ignored it because he always completed his assignments, and his articles were always damn good.

I started to formulate a theory when I noticed how quickly he'd disappear. He'd be there one second, I'd look away, and the next second I looked again he'd be gone. I thought this strange at first, but the more often it happened the more I started to connect the dots.

Then I noticed how Superman and Kent were never in the same place at the same time. At first I thought nothing of it: after all, there were plenty of people who'd never met Superman. But as time went on, I noticed how Kent always _just missed_ him. It was too close to call coincidence. And they did look remarkably alike, if you ignored Kent's glasses.

The clincher was when I found a tie in the elevator. A tie I _knew_ I'd seen Kent wearing that morning. I could not think of a single explanation of why Kent would be leaving ties in the elevator unless he was changing his clothes in there. And there was no other reason that he'd been changing his clothes in there unless he was taking off through the emergency exit in the elevator's ceiling.

But I needed to be sure. So I devised a test. Well… actually… it was more of a stunt. In fact, I'm a little ashamed of how simple it was.

I simply knocked his glasses off his face, making it look like an accident when I called him into my office to discuss something. In the instant before he hid his face from view, I saw Superman's eyes looking back at me.

And I was sure.

But I didn't call him out on it. I never will. I think I understand why he does it. If I were Superman I wouldn't want people mobbing me all the time. Plus, I had no intention of losing my second-best reporter to a cape.

So when Kent handed me his resignation five years ago I was shocked. I was worried. I didn't know what to say or do. But I couldn't prevent him from quitting. It was his life and his choice. And maybe he'd decided living a double life was too hard. So I accepted his resignation with a sigh and a heartfelt invitation to return whenever he felt like it.

Then he disappeared.

In retrospect, I should have told him to stay. I should have told him I knew. I shouldn't have let him resign. I should have held him here, somehow.

She fell apart when he left. She hid it well by burying herself in work and rebounding hard into poor, unsuspecting Richard, and once the baby came along most people thought the change was just about her becoming a mom, but it was more than that. I saw it. And I saw the way she would glance over repeatedly at what used to be Kent's desk, hoping he'd be there without even realizing what it was that she was looking for.

When Jason was born, I counted back the months. And I saw his eyes. They're blue, but not the blue that Richard's are. I had a fairly good idea that he was not Richard's son. That he might belong to a certain Kryptonian in blue tights. I think Lois might have known it somewhere in her, too, but she was still too caught up in denial to admit it.

I never wanted to run 'Why the World Doesn't Need Superman.' Because we do need him. And so does Lois.

That's why I re-hired him when he called after all those years.

When I heard his voice on the phone, I almost choked on my own saliva.

"Uh, Chief? This is Clark Kent. … Well, I was wondering if you happened to have any open positions that you might…"

I hired him back before he finished the sentence.

And when he showed back up at the office, I knew it would only be a matter of days before Superman showed back up in Metropolis.

And sure enough, just later that day, the first person he saved was Lois.

Trouble seems to stick to that girl like glue. In her endeavor to avoid Superman – while ignoring Kent even more than she had before he left – despite my efforts to force her back to him, where I knew she belonged, she managed to get abducted by Lex Luthor in his latest evil plot. Superman saved her, and he saved us all, and in the end, I thought there was a very good chance that I would lose one of my best reporters, this time for good.

He pulled through.

These days he sits at his desk, glancing at Lois with a strange smile on his face and a new light in his eyes. He's finally more at peace then I've ever seen him. His whole face lights up when he sees Jason and the two are becoming fast friends. They are so much alike that my suspicions regarding Jason's parentage have been confirmed. It's a common sight to see little Jason coloring at Kent's desk while Kent watches him with poorly concealed fatherly pride.

Jason will likely wear the suit one day.

Kent still disappears at random intervals through the day, but he still turns in fantastic articles. He even writes a Superman story every once in a while, something he never did before he left. He stills stumbles over himself, but not quite so much as he used to. He still leaves coffee on Lois's desk and asks for nothing in return. He doesn't even vie for her attention. He still corrects her atrocious spelling.

He still doesn't know that I know he's Superman. I have no intention of ever telling him I know. Nor do I intend to ever print a word of this. Even though it would be the best story to ever grace the front page of the Planet.

Some stories are worth sitting on. Knowing that is why I have this job. Not because I know how to yodel.


	2. Part II: Superman's Babysitter

Not Because I Know How to Yodel

Part II

Nefertiri's Handmaiden

Disclaimer: I'm too tired to write one. You make one up instead. Make sure it includes something about me not owning Superman or the movies or anything.

Note: I got some encouragement to continue the story. So here it is, straight from the mind of our favorite Editor in Chief, Perry White.

* * *

Richard is my nephew, and I love him very much. Without any children of my own, Richard is the closest thing I have to a son. I've watched him grow from a lanky, shy kid to a strong man that any father would be proud of.

He's a good man.

But he's not a saint. And he's not perfect. And no man finds it easy to play seconds to Superman. Honestly, that's a pretty damn tough act to follow.

I knew from the beginning that Richard and Lois would never make it to the altar.

Don't get me wrong: I think Lois had honestly convinced herself that she loved him. Maybe she did, in some way.

But not like she'd loved Superman.

To their credit, they didn't fight and argue about it and traumatize poor little Jason. They just… drifted apart, and soon enough they realized the inevitable had happened.

When Richard asked me for a transfer to Australia, a mere six weeks after Superman's fall from the heavens, I gave it to him with a sad, knowing smile.

"I'll be sad to see you go, Son."

"Thanks, Perry."

I didn't try to stop him. Because he's like my son, and he deserves better than a woman who will always love another man.

And Lois deserves Superman.

Jason took the break-up surprisingly well. He was still his same old happy little self, escaping the dreariness of Lois' desk to go slip into my office and sit on my lap as I explained to him just how to run a paper or wander over to Mr. Clark's desk, which now sported a permanent and never-ending supply of crayons, markers, colored pencils, and various colors and sizes of paper. There was also a good supply of Superman pictures now coating the wall surrounding Kent's desk, and even a couple very nice portrayals of a stick figure-esque man sporting a tie and glasses and sloppily labeled "mR. ClARk."

Lois was, of course, hurting. She missed Richard. She missed the security of Richard. But, like I knew she would, she pulled herself together damn quick, adjusting to taking care of her son by herself.

It helped that Kent was more than willing to babysit anytime, at the office or late at night. You could see his eyes light up when Lois asked him if he could maybe please pick up Jason from school at three because she was right in the middle of a break-through on this story and maybe finally she could take down Intergang.

"Sure thing, Lois!"

I could tell Kent was having some serious moral issues. He wanted Lois to be happy, and I guess he thought that Richard had really made her happy. But deep down, he was also a man, and he couldn't hide that he was just a little thrilled that Lois was on the open market again and that he might how have some sort of real chance of being his son's father. But she was also sad, so how could he be happy? It made him disgusted with himself.

I called him into my office one day about six months after Richard left under the pretense of talking to him about a story and smiled to myself as he gently reminded Jason – Lois was off on a lead and Jason was coloring at Kent's desk again – not to wander off and that if he needed anything to go get Mr. Jimmy. Jason nodded obediently and smiled up at Kent.

"Sure thing, Mr. Clark!"

They were so much alike. Down to their identical boyish grins when Lois entered the room.

Kent stumbled against my door and I restrained myself from rolling my eyes at his act.

"What'd you need, Chief?"

"Take a seat, Kent."

I was looking at the latest Superman banner across the first page of my newspaper. Kent glanced it with a modest yet satisfied smile. He'd saved a hundred and twenty-six tourists from drowning on a sinking boat at Niagara Falls yesterday morning, and gotten the story under a Clark Kent byline.

I looked at the picture for a moment and then started talking.

"You know, Kent, I've been thinking. I've been thinking that maybe Lois is ready to get back out there."

He cleared his throat. "Out there?"

"Yeah. You know, out there. Dating again. I think she wouldn't mind a date from you."

His eyes widened. "Me, Chief?" he asked on a squeak.

"Yeah, Kent. You. I think you should take her out."

He sputtered over himself, "I- I, uh… I couldn't…"

I cut him off. "I didn't call you in here to talk about Lois, though. I've got this story I want to you cover…" I saw his eyes fill with relief as I continued on with work, but I could also tell he was seriously considering my advice.

* * *

Two weeks later I was the one baby-sitting little Jason while Kent took out Lois on a date. The office had been shocked when they'd found out.

Kent _finally_ worked up the courage to ask Lois on a date? And she said _yes_? Really? Were there two people more different than Richard and Kent? Than _Superman_ and Kent? No. It was laughable, really.

I was pretty darn proud of myself.

Because Lois hadn't missed only Superman. She'd also missed Clark. She hadn't realized that she'd missed him, but she had. I could tell. I could tell by the way she wouldn't let anyone else get her coffee, not even Richard. Kent had brought her coffee every morning without her asking. She wouldn't let anyone else correct her spelling. She'd sent every draft to Kent before sending them to me. She wouldn't let anyone else help her into her coat. Kent had always held her coat for her. She started smoking again. Kent had always actively opposed her smoking.

Now that he was back, I could see that a gap had been filled in her life. As soon as he got back, they fell into their routine. It was almost as if he'd never left. There was coffee and proof-reading and Kent's chivalry and she stopped smoking only a week after he got back.

Now he was taking her out on a date.

I could tell that she was thrilled when he'd asked her, though she tried to mask it and I was fairly certain she wasn't sure why she was so thrilled. Kent was practically floating around the office. Not actual floating, of course, but I was fairly certain he had to focus on staying earthbound.

So I was baby-sitting Jason.

He was playing on the floor of my living room while I watched him. Alice was in the kitchen cooking dinner. Jason looked up from his toys and met my eye.

"Uncle Perry?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think Mommy and Mr. Clark are going flying on their date?"

I stared at him. "How would they do that, Jason?" I asked cautiously.

He smiled at me. "Don't be silly, Uncle Perry." And he went back to playing.

Great Scott.

This kid was brilliant. He was just five years old and he had only known Kent for a few months, and he already knew something that had taken me a year to figure out.

"Come here, Jason." He stood up and climbed into my lap. "You know about Mr. Clark and Superman, don't you?"

Jason nodded. "But Mommy doesn't. You do."

"Yes, I do. But you know that you can't talk about this with anyone but me and Mr. Clark, right?"

He nodded his little head solemnly. "I know, Uncle Perry. It's a secret!"

"That's right, Jason. And it's Mr. Clark's secret, so we have to be careful not to let anyone know."

"I know." We sat silently for a moment. Then Jason looked at me again. "So do you think they're flying?"

I laughed. "Probably not."

"Will Mr. Clark ever tell Mommy?"

I looked at him seriously. "I think he will soon, Jason. I think he really wants to be with your mom and you."

Jason nodded again. "Good." Then he climbed off my lap and went back to his little Batman figurine.

I bet Kent had been thrilled when he'd seen that one.

* * *


	3. Part III: Interlude 1: Batman

Not Because I Know How to Yodel

Part III

Interlude 1: Batman

Disclaimer: I don't own anything that DC Comics or Warner Bros. owns. I don't own anything of any real artistic value. All I own are my measly fanfiction stories… about characters that I don't own.

Note: Perry White isn't the only one who's in on Superman's identity. What does Batman think now that Superman is back?

* * *

Gotham is quiet tonight. I hear no screams, no sirens, and no smashing glass. It is a night of peace that would have been completely unthinkable when I first started wearing the cape so many years ago. I allow myself a brief moment of satisfaction. I am making a difference. 

Then I hear a tell-tale _whoosh_ and the light _thump_ of boots hitting the concrete roof I'm standing on. I don't have to look behind me to know that those boots are red.

"Clark."

"Bruce."

"You're back," I say bluntly.

He moves to stand beside me, looking out over my city with me. "So I am."

"You find what you were looking for?"

For a moment he is silent. Then - "No."

"So you were gone for five years for nothing."

I watch from the corner of my eye as he closes his eyes and lowers his head. "I wish I'd never left."

That was enough of an apology for me. "Lois must be furious with you."

"She was at first. I kind of made up for it after I rescued her and her family from a sinking yacht and then saved the world by lifting a Kryptonite island into space and then spending several days in the hospital in a coma."

I can't restrain a smile. "Yeah. That's kind of a Get Out of Jail Free card."

"Speaking of that… you'll never guess who left a check at Metropolis Sacred Heart for my medical bills. Bruce Wayne. How about that?"

"I figured you probably didn't carry your credit card in the suit."

He smiles. "You're getting soft, Batman."

"You're the one who was in the hospital, 'Man of Steel.'"

He laughs outright at that. "Touché."

For a moment we are silent again.

I'm careful not to look at him as I form my next sentence. "I guess things have changed a lot since you left. I read that Lois got engaged a few years back. I heard that she has a son with the guy."

He turns to face me. "He's my son."

Whoa. That shocks even me, who takes pride in showing no emotion. I snap my head to look at him. "Are you kidding with me right now?"

He meets my eyes. "Do I look like I'm kidding you?"

I study him for a second and then say the only think I can think of. "Holy shit."

He smiles wryly. "Tell me about it."

I digest that news for a few moments, my brain frantically making connections. "So… what's his name?"

"Jason."

"Is he… like you?"

He frowns. "Let's not talk about that."

I open my mouth and then decide not to press. "Alright. Does her fiancé know this?"

"No, he doesn't know. I want her to tell him, but… well, you know Lois."

I nod. Something occurs to me. "How are things at the office?"

He cocks his head and his frown deepens. "Complicated."

"You still haven't told her you're Clark, have you?"

"No. But I'm going to. Soon. Because of Jason."

I hum in agreement, my eyes focusing off on Wayne Tower for a moment. Then I look back at him.

"I kept an eye on her… while you were gone. Like you asked."

Our eyes meet and hold. In a few small moments, we come to one of those mutual understandings that require no verbal communication. Then he nods his head. We clasp wrists for a second.

We did this once in front of Diana. She called it a 'guy thing.' Maybe it is. But we get each other, Clark and me.

His head turns back in the direction of Metropolis as our hands loosen. "I should get back. Crime in Metropolis has gone up since… you know."

I nod. I know.

He lifts off from the ground but then he turns back to face me and floats there. "Guess who his favorite superhero is."

"Not you?"

"No. Aquaman. He has Aquaman bed sheets."

I stare at him in disbelief. "Aquaman? Come on. Aquaman is lame."

"I think it was Lois' doing. But he does have a Batman action figure."

I grin. "Kid's got good taste."

"I thought you'd like that."

Just then I hear a crash from somewhere. He hears it too, of course. His eyes snap in that direction, switch to telescopic focus, and then narrow dangerously. I know that look.

"Bank robbery. 6th and Ellsworth. It's the Joker."

I can't stop a smirk. I've been waiting for that clown to strike since he escaped from Arkham three weeks ago. I fire a grappling hook and step up on the ledge, preparing to swing. I pause. Then I look back at Clark. "You want to come? It's probably a trap. And it's always nice to have you around in a fight with the Joker."

He looks back at me with his own smile. "I'd love to, Bruce."

I jump from the ledge, slice through the air down to the Bat-cycle parked in the alley below. Above me, I hear the whoosh of him rising higher to get a better look.

With a grin, I rev the engine and peel away toward the bank. When I glance up, I see Superman soaring through the air above me, arms outstretched, cape whipping behind him.

The only thing I can think is: _Thank God he's back_.


	4. Part IV: Lois's Mentor

Not Because I Know How to Yodel

Part IV

Nefertiri's Handmaiden

Disclaimer: I already wrote three! What do you people want from me? Don't you get it by now: I don't own Superman!

Note: Perry White, matchmaker. Lois knows Clark's secret, and there will be hell to pay.

* * *

I pity Superman.

That's right. I said it. I pity him.

Now you all think I'm crazy again. But I have a good reason.

I pity Superman because he's always alone. I pity Superman because he can't be closer to his son. I pity Superman because he lives a lie every day he sets foot in this office.

But mostly, the reason I pity him right now is that he is currently suffering the wrath of Lois Lane.

Now you all agree with me.

Poor bastard.

* * *

He told her the truth the night of their date. At least, I think that's what happened. It's the only reason I can think of that she was _that_ furious.

And when I say furious, I mean _furious_. Like she wouldn't mind if someone started shoving Kryptonite down his throat.

She didn't talk to him. She didn't yell at him. She didn't even look at him. She was just so mad she didn't know what to do with herself.

But she still let Jason color at his desk, so there was hope.

It was late one night after everyone else had left when I decided Kent had suffered enough. Jason was sleeping on my couch, and Lois and Kent were still typing away at their desks as I proofed a column. Every few minutes he would glance at her, but she kept staring determinedly at her computer screen.

I stood and walked to my door. Softly, I called for her. She stood up without looking at Kent, but he watched her all the way into my office. Quietly, she sat down in the chair in front of my desk, after checking on Jason. I sat down in my chair.

"Lois," I whispered, not wanting to wake Jason. "This has got to stop."

She looked at me, eyebrows raised. "What?" she whispered back.

"Kent loves you. He's loved you for as long as I've known him. It's time to forgive him."

She narrowed her eyes. "You don't know what he did."

I looked at her seriously. "Whatever it was, I know that he loves you more than anything, and whatever he did, he did it with noble intentions."

"But he-"

I held up a hand as her voice stared to rise. "It doesn't matter. What matters is that he's clearly remorseful and he will do whatever it takes to make you happy. Are you willing to give that up?"

She looked at me defiantly for a minute, and then her shoulders slumped. She stood and headed back out the door. She stopped briefly at the threshold. "You're just a big softie at heart, Perry." I did my best to look stern. She smiled at me and headed towards Kent's desk like a woman with a mission.

I couldn't hear what they were saying, but I watched as she came to a halt by his desk. He looked at her, and then nervously stood to face her. She looked into his eyes for a moment, and then dropped her head to stare at his shoes. I saw her mouth something that looked vaguely like 'I'm sorry,' and a huge grin spread across his face. I saw him say something I was fairly sure was 'I'm sorry too.' Then she said something I couldn't read, and he nodded. Gently, he placed a hand on the small of her back and they headed toward the elevator. They were going to talk on the roof.

I looked over at Jason. His eyes were open, watching the display between his parents. He saw me seeing him and smiled widely, then gave me the thumbs up sign. I returned the smile and the gesture, and went to sit next to him.

"Don't tell Mr. Clark that I know, okay?"

He looked at me in confusion. "Why?"

"Because I think he likes to keep the secret to himself, and I don't want him to be suspicious of me. But you can tell him that you know."

He smiled widely. "Okay, Uncle Perry."

I ruffled his hair affectionately. "Now go back to sleep," I said. He nodded, closed his eyes, and drifted back to sleep.

I looked back in the direction Kent and Lois had gone.

Things were going to be okay.


	5. Part V: Interlude 2: Wonder Woman

Not Because I Know How to Yodel

Part V

Interlude 2

Nefertiri's Handmaiden

Disclaimer: I don't own Superman, or Batman, or Wonder Woman, or the Martian Manhunter. I don't even own The Flash. I own nothing.

Note: Batman understands why Superman left. Is the rest of the Justice League so forgiving?

* * *

Last night he left a message at League Headquarters. He wanted to meet with us. For a millisecond I considered ignoring his request, feeling angry and betrayed. But in my heart of hearts, Hera help me, I missed my friend. 

So here we stand, waiting on the prescribed rooftop in Metropolis. Every one of us: even Bruce. The cool night air makes my hair flutter out behind me, and I am glad that I am nearly invulnerable to the cold. Wally paces restlessly. John sits motionless on the ledge, eyes closed. J'onn and Bruce stare out over the city. I watch them.

My family. One brother short.

There is a rush of wind and a familiar, though long-absent, _whoosh_.

We all turn to face him as Kal-El touches down in the middle of the roof, cape fluttering majestically in the wind. I have to fight to hide my smile. He always did look positively ethereal.

He looks around at us all, making eye contact with each one of us. Then he hangs his dark head in shame.

"I failed you."

My heart breaks.

Apparently Wally's does, too. He pulls himself up to his full height.

"No. We failed you."

John looks at him in shock. So does Kal-El.

"We should have trusted you. We have no right to just expect you to be wherever we want you at any given moment. You have your own life to live, and your own conscience to clear. If Krypton was where your heart called you, who are we to tell you it's wrong?"

Some people call Wally an immature fool. They are wrong.

Kal-El smiles at him. Wally's easy smile twinkles back at him.

John is not convinced. His voice rises. "Who are we? We're his partners. His friends. His family. And he left us without a second thought."

For a second we all digest that.

It is J'onn who speaks first. "I would have done it, too. If I thought for a moment that my family might still exist on Mars, I would return to them without a second thought."

I raise my head and meet John's eyes. "I would, too."

John looks at us, then at Kal-El, then his posture slumps just a little. "I know. And so would I. But I'm still angry."

Kal-El looks at him with the kind of ironic smile I usually see on Bruce's face. "I'm fairly angry at myself. I did abandon you. In my rush to find a family I knew probably did exist, I forgot why I loved Earth so much. I forgot what I was fighting for. I'm sorry."

I move closer and lay a hand on his arm. "I forgive you."

Wally and J'onn step forward, too. "So do we," chimes Wally.

We look at John. He makes firm eye contact with Kal-El for a moment. Then his face softens. "How could I resist those baby blues? I do, too." They clasp wrists and I try not to roll my eyes. I think that this gesture they do is such a guy thing. Bruce and Kal-El did it in front of me once before, and it hasn't changed since then.

Bruce stands on the other side of the roof, characteristically silent through the whole exchange. I look at him. "What about you, Bruce?"

He steps onto the ledge. "We've said our piece." He fires grappling hook and jumps, swinging away.

Kal-El watches him go with a fond smile. "I missed that overgrown bat. But don't let him know I said so." Then his gaze sweeps over us all, the same fond smile still in place. "I missed you all."

I punch his arm lightly. "You can stop with the flattery. You had me at, 'I failed you.'" He laughs and sweeps me up in a hug. Soon we are all laughing, patting his back and asking questions.

"How was the trip?"

"How are things in Kansas?"

"Is that a new suit?"

"New Krypton must have been a bitch, huh?"

"How was your stay in the hospital?"

Then Wally asks the fatal question. "So things have changed while you were gone, yeah?"

Kal-El's expression changes so swiftly I actually become concerned. "Kal-El?" I ask.

He takes a deep breath. "I have a son."

We stare at him. Then we all speak at once.

John starts, "Are you kidding right now?"

I add, "Lois must be furious with you."

Above all we hear Wally's very articulate, "Holy shit."

This makes Kal-El laugh. "That's exactly what Bruce said."

"So," I press urgently, "what's he like?"

He smiles, his eyes going out of focus. "His name is Jason. He's five years old, and he likes snow peas and coloring." We all smile at him. Kal-El will be a wonderful father.

Then his eyes snap back to focus. He looks at us. "I'm telling you this because I need to ask a favor."

John smiles. "Only back a week and he's asking for favors. Alright, big guy, what do you want?"

"I need you make sure that nothing ever happens to him… if something were to happen to me." He grins wryly again. "I've recently been reminded of my own mortality."

Our faces sport matching serious expressions. J'onn, sensing consensus, speaks. "We swear to protect his life with our own."

Kal-El smiles gratefully.

"Thank y-"

His sentence stops abruptly as his head snaps to the side. His eyes narrow. We all follow his gaze, but things are too far out of our range. He lifts off, hovering several yards above the roof.

"I have to go."

"Need help?" asks Wally.

Kal-El shakes his head with a smile. "Not this time. But I'll call you if I do." We nod, understanding what he's saying. _I won't desert you again_.

He shoots off into the night sky, cape billowing behind him, a sonic boom as he breaks the sound barrier. He is epic in his scope. Superman. We watch him go. In my heart, a weight is lifted. Things seem right in the world again.

Once again, J'onn says what we're all thinking: "Thank God he's back."


	6. Part VI: Busted!

Not Because I Know How to Yodel

Part VI

Nefertiri's Handmaiden

Disclaimer: I don't own Superman. Why won't you believe me???

Note: Clark knows that Perry knows. Busted.

* * *

I always thought I could keep a secret.

I was wrong.

* * *

It happened one day when Lois and Jimmy were off on a story. Jason was, as usual, at Kent's desk. He had some crayons in his hands, but he wasn't drawing. He was talking intently to Kent, who had a fond smile on his face and nodded every few moments.

Then the news report came on.

A pretty blonde reporter with a serious look on her face was standing in screen. Behind her in the distance, there was a volcano erupting.

"…The residents of the island are still here, completely unprepared for this eruption. As you may know, Mt. Kickachu has lain dormant for almost a hundred years, and villages are spread halfway up the side of the volcano. At this moment, hundreds are trapped in these small villages, unable to escape due to the rivers of molten lava now streaming down the mountainside…"

My gaze shot to Kent. His face was a mask of worry, and he kept looking from Jason to the television screen and back. In a second, I realized what was wrong. He didn't want to leave Jason alone, but he needed to go.

The words were out of my mouth before I could help it. "Damn it, Kent! Go! I'll watch him!" He met my eyes in shock for a moment. "Go!" I repeated loudly. He nodded, turned, and almost sprinted toward the elevator, pulling at his tie.

I went to his desk and sat down in his chair. Jason looked at me seriously. I looked right back. Then he smiled and went back to his coloring.

I'd blown my cover now, hadn't I?

I expected Kent would want to talk when he got back.

* * *

Later that day, Kent was still dealing with Mt. Kickachu while Jason was playing with his Batman and Superman figurines on the floor of my office. I had decided to cut Kent a break and bought the Superman action figure for Jason the week before. Jason had fallen in love with it instantly.

"Let's go fight the Joker, Superman!" said Jason, shaking the Batman. Then he lowered his squeaky little voice to imitate Superman. "You're right, Batman! We gotta stop his evil plan! Whoosh," he said enthusiastically, making the little Superman fly away, providing sound effects with a passion. I smiled at him.

My office door opened and Lois came in. "Mommy!" said Jason, "Superman and Batman are fighting the Joker!"

She smiled at him. "Really?"

"Yeah! And Superman's gonna use his x-ray eyes to find the Joker's secret hiding place!"

"Wow! That's pretty neat."

"Superman is so cool."Lois grinned even wider. "He sure is, Jason. Hey, can you go sit at my desk and play there while I talk to Uncle Perry?"

Jason stood, gathering his toys. "Sure thing, Mommy!"

He exited the office, and Lois turned to me. "Where's Clark?"

I looked at her steadily. "He had to go."

"Go?"

"Yes. Go." I looked at the TV, where Superman was still rescuing natives from drowning in a river of lava. "He probably won't be back for about another hour."

She looked at me suspiciously, and then nodded. "Anyway, about my story…"

* * *

I estimated fairly well. Kent returned an hour and twenty minutes later, straightening his tie and running a hand through his hair. He stopped only briefly to ruffle Jason's hair and gently kiss Lois 'hello' and mutter to something to her before heading straight for my office with a determined stride. There was no trace of the timid, clumsy Clark Kent here. It was Superman coming to see me.

I leaned back comfortably in my chair.

Busted.

He came in without knocking and stood before my desk, standing up straight and crossing his arms in a very Superman-y fashion.

"Chief, I think we need to talk." He was using his Superman voice.

"No, we don't," I answered calmly.

His eyes widened in surprise at my answer, and then narrowed in suspicion. "We don't?" Looking at him now, I couldn't believe I had ever thought he was nothing more than Clark Kent.

"No. We don't. I don't print stories that ruin the lives of good men, Kent. Besides, I like having you reporting for this newspaper."

He stared at me intently. Great Cesar's Ghost, he was an intimidating man. It took all the confidence I'd amassed in all my years of reporting to keep eye contact with Superman. Then he seemed to come to an internal conclusion and smiled widely.

"You're a good man, Perry White."

I just raised an eyebrow. He laughed and headed back toward the bullpen. Before he exited my office, I called him back. "Kent."

He turned to face me. "Yeah, Chief?"

I couldn't help it. I grinned. "Would you like a desk closer to the door?"

* * *


End file.
